Every child has the right to a happy childhood, and his parents lay the foundation of it from the first days of the life of a new person. Who supported when the first step on the earth was taken? Who prompted the first word, consoled, helped to understand the first truth, to show courage, courage for the first time? Mother father!
At the same time, how much happiness a child gives to his father and mother: how much joy is given to the birth of a healthy child, in his smile, his first timid steps, in the babble “mom”, “dad”, and, finally, in the attention and care of the children for them, elderly parents .
Raising children is a true art that has to be perfected all my life. Those who believe that it is enough to create excellent living conditions at home, to have complete prosperity, are mistaken, and the environment itself (family, kindergarten, school, etc.) “automatically” ensures all further upbringing of the child. Others, on the contrary, are so strict in upbringing that their children grow up uncommunicative and poorly prepared for the correct solution of many problems of our time.
Of course, it is naive to think that the formation of a child’s personality entirely depends only on the will of the parents, but their role can hardly be overestimated. When raising children, a standard approach, a template, is unacceptable. It always requires thoughtfulness, resourcefulness, flexibility in the application of various methods, and most importantly – an individual approach to each child, a sense of proportion in everything and genuine love for him. Modern parenting makes the life of the father and mother rich, happy and fruitful. In a Soviet family, husband and wife bear equal responsibility before society for their children.
We have already said that the birth of a healthy child depends on the condition of not only the mother, but also the father. This should never be forgotten.
The birth of a child makes a big difference in the usual lifestyle of parents. The child requires the tireless care of the mother, and with his appearance in the family a new way of life is established. A lot here depends on the father – both the mother’s happiness and the baby’s happy childhood. Sometimes it seems to a young father that at the beginning of his life a son or daughter needs only a mother, and he himself can not bring any real benefit. This is not true! A child always needs a father.
To begin with, the father, having come home, can and must free the mother from caring for older children, giving her the opportunity to do everything for the baby. It is now that mothers urgently need help and support. She needs to adapt physically and emotionally to the new routine of life. If the father shares her concerns, is invariably tender and considerate with her, then this will also benefit the child – because only when the mother is in a balanced and cheerful state of mind does she pay due attention to the child that he needs, no less than good care. The father can take on that part of the homework that the mother does not have time to finish. It must be remembered that just at the time when the mother still feels physically fragile, she has to fulfill the difficult and new (when the first-born in the family) her countless responsibilities for caring for the newborn and combine them with other household chores. Therefore, everything that a father does to facilitate her work will be beneficial to the baby.
Sometimes young dads are afraid to take a baby in their arms (“it is so fragile and small!”) And look after it, but very soon they become convinced that this is not difficult. A father who is nursing a baby has a deep sense of closeness to him, and the baby very quickly gets used to a kind, strong and affectionate man. The realization that the mother and father love him equally is the first and greatest happiness for the child.
CHILD EDUCATION FOR FEEDING.
Most worries and anxieties for parents are feeding. Healthy infants retain a good appetite if feeding is done methodically correctly. That the child eats willingly is absorbed more fully and faster. The child has a desire to be determined by a feeling of hunger, which occurs after a certain time. His attitude to food also depends on the “degree of participation” in the intake of this food. If the child is not excited by anything, then he eats with pleasure. In those cases when food is late, the child is aroused and eats poorly.
The correct feeding regimen develops motor-nutritional reactions in children – sucking, lips removing food from a spoon, chewing, etc. Movements such as holding a crust of bread, cookies, a spoon, etc., take shape.
From the first months of life, it is necessary to encourage the child to vigorously suck. It’s bad when they don’t teach him to take breasts well and immediately go on feeding expressed breast milk from a bottle and, finally, give a second breast: the baby begins to refuse to suckle very early. As a result, in the first months it can be difficult to maintain breastfeeding, especially with reduced lactation.
At 3 months of age, children are easily distracted by feeding, therefore, giving them breasts, you can not talk. You can play and talk with the baby only after he sucks the amount of milk put to him. When feeding from a bottle, such active movements also develop, such as pulling the head to the bottle being brought up, and from 3 months of age, grabbing it with hands. From the 5th month of life, children themselves take the bottle in their hands, independently direct it into the mouth. It is necessary to feed from the bottle holding the baby in her arms in the same position as when breastfeeding, for 8-10 minutes. During this time, the entire serving should be eaten . The hole in the nipple is made small: fast food is harmful, because the food does not have time to be processed by digestive juices and is absorbed worse.
With the introduction of complementary foods, the child receives half- thick food from a spoon. From this age, the child needs to wash his hands before eating. It is possible to feed the child from a spoon, holding him in a half-sitting position. To teach the baby to remove food from a spoon, you need to carefully touch the tip of the spoon to the upper lip. When offering a child new food, you need to be especially affectionate with him. In no case do not get angry or annoyed if the child refuses food! Make sure that the position, posture of the child while eating is comfortable. Do not rush him, even if urgent business awaits. If you are stubbornly reluctant to eat new food, you should give breast milk after each spoon, but you can’t mix different types of food into a kind of “porridge” and feed it to the babies.
Half-year-old children usually eat well with a spoon, but it is necessary that they be in the hands of an adult during meals. Children aged 8 months , if they know how to sit well and eat from a spoon, are put at the table. By this time, you should teach to drink from a cup. Mother holds the cup and helps the baby hold it.
The entire feeding process should take place calmly, it is recommended to accompany with speech all actions related to food. If the word constantly indicates an action (for example, “open your mouth” or “take bread”), then this helps to develop understanding of speech, activates the child’s participation in food.
When you notice that the child makes attempts to eat on his own (for some it manifests itself at the age of 11 months ), you need to be prepared for new chores. The kid runs his fingers into a plate and tries to send food into his mouth, he tries to pick up a cup and drink without assistance. At first everything, of course, may turn out to be spilled. In this case, it is necessary to calmly explain, help the child, with a smile to rebuke for awkwardness. “Good manners” will come later, and you will still have time to teach him this, but by the end of the 1st year to accustom the child after eating to wipe his lips with a napkin and tilt his head in response to the mother’s offer “say thank you” – it is highly desirable. For most children, the vagaries of eating are just a passing moment. With skillful handling, they gradually achieve that the child begins to eat with pleasure and tidy.
HEALTH AND EDUCATION OF CHILDREN.
The brain has a health limit, which is in direct proportion to age. The smaller the child, the faster the fatigue of nerve cells occurs, which is removed only by sleep. This is the physiological meaning of sleep: without it, the activity of all organs and systems of the body, the behavior of the baby are disrupted.
Evidence does not require the fact that the growth and development of the child, his attitude to the environment (including positive qualities, bad habits and other personality traits) depend on upbringing. It is known that from the first days of life, a child gradually develops conditioned reflexes through which habits, behavior and even character traits are formed. At the same time, sensory organs are improving, providing a connection with the environment and the development of movements, thinking and speech.
Of great importance for raising a healthy child is the regime of the day – the correct alternation of sleep, feeding and wakefulness.
At the 1st month of life, the baby’s sleep and wakefulness are not systematized, they occur erratically, and his behavior largely depends on the timely satisfaction of needs. The duration of wakefulness of the child of the first month is 40-60 minutes. At the 2nd month of life, under the influence of various external stimuli and improvement of the nervous system, the child may not sleep on average about 1 1/2 hours; sleep also undergoes changes and becomes longer (at 3 months of age, the child has been continuously sleeping for 1 1/2 to 2 hours).
The daily regimen in the change of sleep and wakefulness is developed under the influence of the natural differences of day and night – the child sleeps more at night, and is awake during the day. The rhythm in the change of sleep and wakefulness during the daytime is established by practice – their strict alternation. It is necessary that the baby quickly fall asleep, sleep soundly and calmly wake up. For this, children should always sleep at the same time. Fresh air has a soporific effect on children, and this must be used! Performing the daily regimen, it is possible to develop a regimen in the change of sleep and wakefulness by the end of the 2nd month of a child’s life.
Wakefulness should be sufficient in duration, otherwise natural fatigue does not occur and the child does not fall asleep for a long time, and falls asleep later, does not wake up by the time of feeding. However, with excessive wakefulness, overwork occurs, the children begin to cry. This should not be allowed: the baby needs to be put to bed in a timely manner.
A child aged 1 – 1 1/2 months needs to hang various bright toys for 30-40 minutes at a distance of 70-60 cm from the crib.
Raising, feeding and caring for a child in the 1st year of life is very closely related. In essence, these are links of a single complex process. Here you need to consider the age of the baby. Each age stage has certain tasks and methods for resolving them.
Raising children aged 3 to 6 months.
The main tasks of upbringing during this period are the organization of the daily regimen, which should correspond to the age of the child and his individual characteristics: development of visual and auditory perception; development of vocal reactions; the development of hand movements, the ability to take and hold toys, the development of movements that will then be required when crawling.
The visual and auditory perception of children in this period is more perfect than at the age of 3 months , they follow the environment, distinguish and recognize familiar objects, show interest in them, seek to get them. Therefore, they should be given more diverse toys (of various shapes, colors, sizes).
At 3 1/2 months of age, babies turn their heads towards the sound source, recognize familiar voices and enjoy it. By 5-6 months they move briskly, clap their hands, move their legs to the sounds of a dance melody. Emotional perception is complicated and becomes more persistent: 4-5-month-old children are smiling; at the 6th month of life, they laugh out loud, selectively relate to others, when they see friends they rejoice, they are afraid of strangers. The appearance of parents causes children to “auditory and visual concentration”, a smile and laughter, energetic movements. They begin to respond to speech, understanding of it develops thanks to the “conversations” of the mother with the child. These “conversations” are extremely important. Moreover, speech should be rich in intonations.
Mother should talk with the baby on a variety of occasions. For example, before eating: “Sasha, we’ll eat now.” In other cases, she asks: “Sasha, give me a pen, put on a shirt,” etc. It is advisable to build a speech in short sentences, highlighting the most important words in terms of intonation.
In children of 6-7 months of age, positive emotions more often arise during games, so it is necessary to encourage them in every way – to allocate a place, appropriate toys, etc.
From the 3rd month of life, vocal reactions develop that contribute to the formation of speech. At 3-4 months of age, children pronounce the larynx sounds ” gi “, ” ghee “, at 4-5 months they already sing ” aaaa “, at the age of 6 months they begin to babble, that is pronounce individual syllables: “ba”, “ ma ”, “yes”. From these syllables in the future the first words are added. This occurs as a result of the development of the ability to imitate. The kid listens to the sounds he makes, often repeats them for a long time. But it’s easier to repeat the sounds that adults teach him.
At the same time, there is a “refinement” of the basic movements: the child learns to direct his hands precisely to the object that attracted his attention, to take, to feel it. The baby can take toys from the hands of an adult at the age of 4-4 1/2 months. At first, there are failures: little hands “collide”, but the toy is not taken. Gradually, by the 5th month, children confidently point their hands to the toys and take them first with two hands, and then with one. Half-year-old children can hold a toy in each hand. All this is of great importance. Having learned to play, children are drawn to toys to take them, change their position, position, and master new movements. The child’s ability to lie on his stomach is being improved: by the 5th month he can raise the upper half of his body high, resting on the palms of his straightened arms. From this situation, it is much easier and more interesting for him to observe the environment.
At 6 months, children get on all fours, resting on the palms and knees; this pose prepares them to crawl. Trains them before crawling and turning over, which the child completely masters by the 6th month (turns from back to stomach and back). The first attempt to roll over on the stomach occurs in the child by the 4th month, first he turns on his side, and then on the stomach. This movement achieves the greatest effect if the children have already learned to grab toys. It is the desire to grab the toy that prompts the baby to roll over and take it. All this well strengthens the muscles of the legs and arms, chest, abdominal muscles. The first attempts to crawl to the subject are unsuccessful: instead of moving forward, “for some reason” creeps “back. But gradually (by the 7th month) the children begin to crawl freely.
Some are mistaken in thinking that the most correct one in the development of the child’s movements is to master the ability to sit independently, then crawl. Observations show that a child who has learned to sit before crawling is helpless. On his stomach, he cries or lies completely indifferent, with his head bowed, without desire for movement.
Neither children who have already learned to sit, nor those who still cannot sit should be wrapped in pillows. With this kind of “training” the child is forced to remain in a passive state, without movements, which negatively affects both physical and neuropsychic development.
By the 5th month, the child straightens his legs and in the knees, and in the hip joints, but still stands with support under the armpits, and at the age of 6-7 months is already supported only by the arms.
Raising children aged 6 to 9 months.
In this age period, parents face new challenges: organizing a daily regimen with three times a day’s sleep, developing a child’s understanding of speech – the gradual formation of communication, further improving the action with objects and preparation for crawling – the first step of independent walking.
From the age of 7 months, the child understands the adult’s speech: it is enough to name one or another object familiar to him, located in a certain place, so that he starts looking for him with a look or points with his hand to the question “where?”
By the 9th month, to the question “where?”, The child finds several familiar objects, regardless of their location.
Since that time, the baby fulfills other requests: to sit down, lie down, make “little things”.
Now you can organize the first games (“frogs”, “hide and seek”, “catch-up, catch-up”), gradually develop the baby’s speech from individual sounds to syllables. At first, the child is taught to repeat the syllables that he began to pronounce, and by the 9th month – new combinations of sounds. In children, they strive to attract attention – this is the beginning of the baby’s verbal communication with adults. It is possible to improve actions with toys during this period with the help of various games (with a ball, ball, games with skating, throwing, nesting, taking out, etc.). Games bring children joy, contribute to the development of movements. At the age of 6-7 months, the child takes all the toys in approximately the same way, regardless of their properties: shifts hands, taps them, picks them up and throws, and so on. By the 8th month, children, playing, usually only knock toys. At the age of 9 months, their actions with toys become more diverse. The desire to achieve certain results begins to manifest: the child puts a small nesting doll into a large one until it can be done.
A crying child at this age can be easily reassured by offering him a toy.
Baby crawls willingly. This helps to strengthen the entire musculature and the development of coordination of movements. Learning to crawl, children quickly master the ability to sit down independently. After the baby tries to get up independently at the age of 9 months, he gets used to stand more and more steadily, hold on to the support with only one hand. The next stage – the child steps over the barrier, around the playpen, bed, gradually mastering the art of moving forward.
Parenting from 9 months to 1 year old.
Children aged 9-10 months understand a large number of words, distinguish the intonation with which they are spoken, react to the word “not.” They are long and diverse babble. The understanding of the adult’s speech is followed by the first meaningful words: “mother”, “father”, “woman”, “uncle”, “give”, etc. By the year the child utters about 10 such words. Together with a gesture and facial expressions, this helps communicate with others. At the sight of food, toys, children require “give-give.”
Further improvement in the baby’s speech is entirely dependent on adults. It is easiest for children to imitate sounds at the moment of interest, during the demonstration of voiced toys (dogs, cats, cows, etc.). And soon speech becomes the most important means of his communication with others.
Is it worth it to be overjoyed if your baby begins to speak very early ? No, and one should not be upset if he does not know many more words and in this is behind his peers. There are age differences when children begin to speak and when they are fluent in speech. Let’s try to follow the stages of the development of children’s speech. By the end of the 1st year of life, the child understands only the simplest speech addressed to him, and can make about 10-15 meaningful words. Only by the age of 2 his vocabulary becomes richer and he masters simple phrases.
Speech is a complex process that requires muscular, mental and emotional coherence, which is difficult for a small child. Here, an important role belongs to others. They should maintain the sound activity of the child, constantly gently talking to him from the 1st month of life. If the child has not mastered a certain number of sounds, does not show interest in them, then it will be difficult to form a mimic of speech in him.
We must strive in every way to develop auditory perception in children. For this, it is very useful for adults to talk near the child, by his bed, playpen. The child also concentrates when he hears a quiet melodious tune, when he is given the opportunity, with absolute silence, to listen to the sound of a musical instrument or a voiced toy. You should teach your child to look for an invisible sound source, for which an adult walks around the bed and “hides” from the baby, calls out, uses sounding objects or toys, etc.
From 6-7 months of age, you need to cause the baby to imitate the syllables. Turning to the child, it is necessary to be in his field of vision. This increases activity, attention: he watches the speaker, moves his lips, as if trying to make a sound.
In the formation of imitation, at first they encourage the baby to repeat only what he has already mastered. For example, a child says: “aaaa.” An adult, going up to him, asks: “Olenka, say aaaa.” In this case, the emotional response of the child often arises. At the 7-8th month, they gradually accustom themselves to the ability to repeat new sound combinations. At the same time, new, but suitable and close to them sounding “yes-yes”, “ di-di ”, “ta-ta-ta” are added to the combinations that are already contained in babble .
The next stage is the development of a child’s understanding of speech. Adults are advised to explain to the child everything that he paid attention to; often call bright or sounding toys, the names of people around you, some things in the room, animals, various actions that the child sees or performs himself.
However, this is not enough to understand speech. It is necessary to specially show children various objects and name them, give “instructions” and train the child to perform them, first with the help of an adult, and then at the request of an adult and on your own (“give the ball”, “show where the doll is”, “make the cakes” and etc.). At the end of the 1st year of life, you can teach your child to pronounce words meaningfully. This training requires the child to understand the word well. Then they get the child to repeat it. To the question “where is mom”? the child must point to the mother, on the task “say: mom”; the child must say “mother”.
When talking with children, it is advisable to use those words that they are already able to pronounce. By showing and then asking the child “what is this?”, “Where is it?”, He succeeds in developing a meaningful understanding of the subject and the correct use of words for communication. At the end of the 1st year of life, the sounds and gestures of the child become already expressive, but he still says little.
It is imperative that the child hears the correct speech around him, beautiful singing and the melodious sound of musical instruments. This will set him a good example.
When entering into a conversation with a child, do not imitate his child’s talk, do not lisp, accustom to warped “children’s” words, for example, “ yum-yum ”, “ tprua ”, do not allow those who surround the baby and communicate with him . However, you do not need to constantly instruct the child, ensuring the correct pronunciation of words. Incorrect pronunciation of words will disappear gradually as speech improves further. The development of children’s speech enriches their game. So, at 10-11 months of age, a child can be asked to bring a toy (of course, if he knows its name). It is best to invite the baby to do the familiar action with the toy and teach them how to perform a simple new action (“shake the bark ”, “feed the dog”, etc.). Actions with items are becoming more diverse. Children put rings on the pyramid, lay cubes on top of each other. These actions are longer. There is a further development of common movements. At the age of 10-11 months, children easily move from one support to another, climb a hill (from 3 steps) and leave it. By the 12th month, babies take independent walking.
Children in this period are especially sensitive and relate to surrounding adults in different ways. Those who are more affectionate, they strive for, more stringent are wary. In the hands of strangers, even their favorite toys become indifferent to them. Children react negatively to the new environment, which should be considered.
The relationships between children at this age are different. One child is interestedly watching the actions of another, but negative relationships often arise, caused by initial egoism, the desire to receive at all costs the toy that the other child plays. In this case, it is necessary to explain gently, but persistently, that you cannot do this, offer another toy, etc.
ABOUT SOME HYGIENIC SKILLS.
It is often asked at what age you need to start planting children on a pot. Until the age of 8 months, this should not be done. Practice shows that during the 1st year, not all children manage to get used to asking for a pot. Therefore, it is necessary for some time to come to terms with the washing of soiled diapers and panties. Only by the year some children begin to ask, and although this skill of tidiness is extremely unstable, it needs to be fixed! In the 2nd year, the ability to control the function of the bladder and intestines gradually develops. Only then, the efforts of parents in developing such habits will succeed.
Occasionally, children begin to ask for a pot before they turn 8-9 months old. With careful attention to the child, it is possible to determine the corresponding need by his behavior. It is better to plant the child after sleep (if he got up dry) and after 15-20 minutes after eating. You should not plant the child too often, and especially after he has already wet or soiled his pants. Night plantings that break sleep are generally useless. It’s better not to do this, but carefully change the diaper, protecting the baby’s sleep in every way. They should not be kept on the pot for a long time, since this slows down the physiological functions, you need to remove it from the pot and after a while plant it again.